she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Randomize
