I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
Randomize
