I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
Randomize
