make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
Randomize