i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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