do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize
