your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
Why was I so drunk last night that I licked the bar and then the bartenders face? Why didn't you stop me? We can never go back there.
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
Randomize
