Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
Randomize
