okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
We left an ass print on the piano.
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
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