she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
lol hangovers are for mortals.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
