i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
Randomize
