I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
