you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
Randomize
