And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
Randomize
