so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
I met the friendliest cop last night
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
My mom is lecturing me about 'invaluable housekeeping skills' while I google 'cocktails involving gin' on my phone. I can feel the generational gap looming in her silent judgment of my choices.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
Randomize
