Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
Randomize
