Just mADE A PArabola og urine
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
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