More tranny stories later!
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
Randomize
