Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
Randomize
