"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize