Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
This is my gift to your gina
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
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