She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
My ass is underappreciated
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
Randomize
