i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize