Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
if I start to respond to these political texts with a middle finger emoji - do you think they will get the hint?
Randomize