Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
that is very illegal...i love you.
Randomize
