erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
I think I just shit out all my problems.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Randomize
