I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
I'm on my "fiiiiirrrst" glass of wine- the quotes mean it's the last of the bottle- so I really need you to pick up your phone so we can talk about this
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
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