Porn is love you can see.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize
