im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
