I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
third nipple confirmed
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
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