Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
Randomize
