My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
Randomize
