thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
Randomize
