your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
White coat. Heels.
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize
