I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
I lost the right to judge tonight
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
