I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
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