I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
So I have to send you an email about my weekend, heretofore referred to as The Perfect Weekend. Wherein I have lots of awesome sex with a guy with THE MOST AMAZING BODY.
I look forward to this email. I will respond with, Condoms and Creepers: The Adventures of Online Dating.
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Randomize
