So I'm eating my burger minding my own business, when the guy next to me starts up a conversation. Seemed normal at first, stocks, bonds, etc...then he said...and I quote "I can push a bowling-ball up a flight of stairs with my tongue." As I awkwardly laughed he broke out "I bet you I could bite the head off of a rabbit."
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
That reminds me...we need to get swords
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
Randomize
