Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
