You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
Randomize
