and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
where are my pants?
in the oven.
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize