Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
Randomize