We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Randomize
