I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
Randomize
