No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
Randomize
