Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
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