One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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