I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
Randomize
