Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
my sisters under your porch take her home
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
Randomize
