What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
Can you repeat that, but with context?
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
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